The Boston Red Sox swept the Colorado Rockies. Only further proving that God loves his irony. The Colorado Rockies are vehemently all over God's Balls. What does the Almighty do to his most devoted MLB team? He gives them a miraculous 21 of 22 games, and an all too holy playoff run all the way into the World Series. The Rockies then proceeded to be blasphemously bible-slapped by the barbarous Boston Red Sox. Great. What God granted me (and that is really all that matters) is a swift subtle ending to baseball. I truly do thank God for retiring Barry Bonds so that I will never have to watch anything else about his gay homerun countdown. Yes, gay. No more top 10 plays of some fruit basket catching a piece of fruit in a wide open field without anybody else trying to remove his face while he does it (yes I called a baseball a piece of fruit). Now all sports media outlets can concentrate on what is really important: Football. God's Linebacker can finally get all the attention he needs from His Holiness.
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