Atlanta Falcons ex-head coach Bobby Petrino really was bummed about Michael Vick's 23 month sentence (for 23 dog stranglings) and he hated seeing 6 people in the stands in Atlanta on Monday Night Football so he couldn't wait to get out of that shit hole and go to a really awesome place: Arkansas!
Dear Atlanta Guys,
Look I seriously had no idea all this shit was gonna happen. I was coach for like a week then Michael Vick went to jail. I'm really sorry but that dude was totally this entire team. I could have sworn I put a Vick Jail=Bobby Leave clause in my contract. Who cares. Anyway I'm shipping out to Arkansas 'cause its preeeetty cool there. They have Darren McFadden. That guy is good, let me tell you. He's been 2nd place in Heisman voting like two years in a row. I'm totally gonna kick ass there. So yeah, what week are we in? Whatever, it's best for my family for me to go, becaaaaauuuuuussse uhhhhhhh....Arkansas is Da Bomb, lemme tell you. Don't be too sad I'm going 'cause Emmitt Smith is the new coach. He's cool. I wish I could have finished this season with you guys...but some circumstances...didn't it rain yesterday? Yeah, that's why I can't do this any more. This weather sucks.
Peace homies, Bobby P
P.S. If Vick gets on Prison Break, Tivo it for me. It's totally gonna happen.
[Thanks to KSK for the picture]
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